MY REALITY

Okay so I'm supposed to be writing a 15 page research paper and a 2page review paper which were due two weeks ago. I had originally gotten an extension until last week and got another until Monday. I just can't get myself to actually write the freakin M%$#a F&*$in thing! Holy this is ridiculous... somebody anybody help me... save me!!!! I've been on this couch all day doing nothing. My poor dog wants a walk and my back is killing, but I'm not moving somehow I've convinced myself that sitting here is better than moving. By sitting here I'm somehow showing my commitment to my work. The task has become to big and my concentration is none existent. Is it that I hate my courses or that I am just not smart enough? Is it that I'm so tired of failing that I want to fail?!?! No that doesn't make any freakin sense. I want to throw something into the wall beat my face on the ground I want to scream and punch someone in the face, anyone who walks by. The frustration is overwhelming me.... I have word vomit and I choke and gag on the curse words that rumble in my throat. URRRGH.... I hate this!!!

Am I just lazy? Or is this really ADHD?

Turomcomecome.... I dunno why but I often have words like this that I must expel from my throat. I never know what they mean or why they are there, but what I do know is if I don't expel them then something terrible will happen to us all... so do this with please...

Say Tur- rum-come-come... with me six times as loud as you can!!

TURRUMCOMECOME TURRUMCOMECOME TURRUMCOMECOME TURRUMCOMECOME TURRUMCOMECOME TURRUMCOMECOME TURRUMCOMECOME TURRUMCOMECOME

I had to say it two more times because I had to... (I'm still saying it!)

What's the matter with me? God why why why why????????

Frig I'm a sailor so if you don't like cursing I'm sorry but it's a requirement for my daily functioning.

Any who...

Thanks for stopping by...

XOXO

Hopeful 2day (yea freakin right!)